“I do”. To some, the two most significant words they will ever hear. Many people dream of the ‘big day’, with all the white and the wine and even a little weeping too, as them and the person that they wish to spend the rest of their life with profess their love in the eyes of the law to cement their everlasting bond. However, in modern society where, in England and Wales, 41% of marriages end in divorce (ONS, 2012), is the ‘happily-ever-after’ dream of married life, merely an unachievable fairytale?
Well, to me, anyway.
Being the tender age of 17, and, for obvious reasons, not yet married, you may call me naive for thinking so but I think I have a strong case in my favour. Understandably, not all marriages last and this can be as a result of a multitude of different things, however to me, this is often because the couple is not the right match. As a self confessed romantic, I’m a firm believer in the old Chinese legend of the ‘red string of fate’. This idea expresses that two people who are destined to be together, are connected by an invisible thread that may be tangled and stretched but will remain unbroken. The ‘red string of fate’ concept resonated with me because I think that, even if you don’t necessarily find them during your lifetime, there is ‘the one’ out there for everyone – some are lucky enough to find them, some not. If you do meet said person, I feel the possibility of a successful marriage is high.
This person may not be your ideal type, they may not be a Gosling, Garfield or Gomez, but they’ll have that something; that ‘je ne sais quoi’. They’ll have you staying up all night thinking about the way they say your name, the way they walk, the little creases that grace the corner of their eyes when they laugh. They’ll mystify, intrigue, confuse and captivate with their very presence and before you know it, you’re stuck in a dark, scary whirlwind they call love, and when this love stands strong despite the flaws in both parties, you have the makings of a good relationship.
Take my parents for example, they’ve had the lows and highs, my mom has put up with my dad’s inability to be punctual and my dad has put up with my mom’s obsession with cleanliness and order, they’ve had fights all the way from light banter to world war 3, yet through all of this they’ve stayed together and are as much in love as they were in the ’80s when they met. You may ask, ‘what is their secret?’, and from my point of view, it’s compromise. It may sound a little cliche but for a relationship to work, people have to accept that they aren’t always right and, even if they think they are, they should be able to sacrifice things as that other person should for them.
As for myself, I am yet to experience the feeling of falling in love but even the mention of it, sends me into a dreamlike trance and the optimist in me tells me that it’ll happen some day, whether it be in ten days or ten years. And then when I think of finding ‘the one’, I start thinking about a wedding and my life as someone’s wife and I can’t help but get a little bit too excited…and I may then find myself looking at Marchesa wedding gowns… A girl can dream, right? Anyway, as per usual, I digress. To end, I hope that my experiences in the future will prove me right and I hope that you will find happiness and love in the years to come.
This post may be a little all over the place but I guess that’s a reflection of my thoughts and I hope that it at least has sparked a few branches of thought in a least one person.
Any comments, thoughts and questions are much appreciated.
P.S I’ll leave you with a few pieces from Tyler Knott Gregson that make me hopeful that true love exists.